29.12.07

greetings from the void...

Hello.

It snowed again yesterday. Nothing really significant - maybe four inches int he worst places. But the rate of snowfall was enough to make the roads tough to drive on for those of us with shitty little pickup trucks. I was sliding all over the place until I got back into my driveway and loaded that 200 or so lbs of chopped wood into the back of the truck. Strapped together, this load will serve as enough ballast to give me at least minimal traction until warmer weather rolls around.

When not running a quarter ton of crap to the landfill or doing dishes (to be honest, I love doing house-husband type work on my days off) I was lucky enough to get some lunch with my friend Cindy yesterday.

It was nice to see her after so many months - being an old married guy now I spend most the time in the house or at work. She lent me an ear which allowed me to get something off my chest that had been irking me for a bit. And that's why I have effectively stopped doing photography.

Screw it - time to get ready for work.

22.12.07

further demonstrations of my marketing panache...

I am an unrecognized advertising genius. The deep well of my marketing ability will someday be tapped by one lucky agency or another. Here are my latest examples of reframing the marketing landscape*.



Wake and Bake Barbie, featuring 80% more dialation.



Hidden Camel-Toe Barbie. Comes with her own carefully placed floral camoflage.


Brazilian Bikini Wax Barbie, with no further explanation necessary.

The Kaplan Thaler Group need only click here to email me their opening offer. Manhattan's Gain will be Kenosha's loss.


*Please pardon the shitty pictures, but you can only expect so much out of a camera phone. It seems when you go to a chain store and start taking pictures of the shelves security is inevitably called. Then they commandeer your camera and send you home sans $300 in electronica and that gets a tad too expensive after a while - or at least that's been my experience.

15.12.07

the miracles of photoshop...

Have been posting way too many movies recently, but that's because I haven't had a damned thing to say.

While this short is a plug for a corporate event, I think it is a nice corporate event. And besides, it's a message I can get behind. Enjoy!

14.12.07

one from the hard...

err, make that "heart."

morning time waster...

Well, have been having some YouTube fun (as the last post demonstrates) and have finally set up my new phone for video linkup with YT. Am busy uploading different small videos, seeing if/how they work and taking them down as fast. Might have to get my wifey a bigger memory card for her phone and one for mine so we can both do this.

Merry Fuckin' Christmas...



and Happy Goddammed New Year from the corporation...

10.12.07

7.12.07

time to take a dump...

I had plans to get some things done today or yesterday, two of my days off. Luckily, however, shit of both other people's making and my own helped assure only one minor thing was ticked off my list.

I'm depressed. Not suicidally so, but I have come to a point that low-level mental health workers might recognize as having "flat affect." I sort of want to feel things about the whole load of not getting anything done but can't quite marshal the emotion to actually give a fucking damn about things.

The last two days have been marked by intense fighting, not with my coworkers, bosses, friends or even my wife. Rather I have been fighting with my wife's 9 year old boy about his homework. He has come up with what amount to elaborate schemes to not have to address getting it done. I keep pointing out to him that a) he always gets caught and b) he always has to do it anyway. But neither of these things seem to impress him.

For example, yesterday we had planned for him to get his homework done at the school's homework club (the equivalent of "study hall" in high school). If, we had told him, his homework was all done by the time he was picked up we'd be going straight to the hill and spending about an hour and a half sledding till he had to come with me to a meeting.

His scheme for getting out of this was as intricate as it was futile. He opted to not write his homework assignments in his assignment notebook (if we don't see it after all, we can't know it exists). Problem was he wrote one obscure line about page 108 in there and that note let us know something was due even though we had no clue as to what it was or when it was due.

He lies to us almost every time we talk to him about homework. Hence, when he told us that there was nothing due till Monday we automatically did not believe him. To complete the evening's stupidity we went to a neighbor girl's home and discovered there was math due in the morning. He had mentioned the math assignment but said he had completed it at homework club. He said he'd left it at school because it was finished and did not need to be checked.

(An aside - was I wrong to not trust him? You might say yes, but I believe my belief was well-founded based on his track record. And today my wife received an email via the boy's teacher from the teacher at homework club. She was contacting the teacher to see if there were any incompletes from him. Seems he spends the period talking to other children and drawing and not doing any homework. She believes that he is blowing it all off at school and spending time at home doing it. I applaud her for seeing that. But back to the evening of woe.)

I hand copied his math assignment and made him do it over the course of the evening. Of course he had no clue how to do it (that he has done some of the very same types of assignments before lets me know he is either confused or lying) and wailed that I was most unreasonable.

There was fighting, crying and general nonsense for quite a long while during this it seemed.

The evening ended really well though the middle section was very rough. He came with me to my meeting (though these shenanigans made me 20 minutes late in getting there). And while he wailed and refused at the beginning of the assignment he did do it completely and successfully with minimal help from me (another of his schemes involves him trying to get either his mother or me to give him the answers. I try and counter this by constructing another problem in identical form on a worksheet and walking him through it).

The worst part about this is that I am not a good instructor, especially when my student is constantly trying it play me. So he gets frustrated, I get angry and his mother and I fight.

All this would be so much fucking easier if he would just honestly attempt to do his work. I could accept that.